A lose-lose situation

Today was one of those days...

It started as any other normal, boring, annoying, mundane day at work. Phones ringing, customers queuing, stupid people asking stupid questions, me trying to keep it courteous and professional and thinking that two more days of work and then I'll be enjoying my coffee and ciggies while surfing the net and doing the things I love.

Anyway, ten minutes before I finished and was time to go home, a couple of customers, a young lady and a not-so-young man, sat down on my desk and the girl gave me her card.  

I asked her to confirm her address and she did, and then when I saw the date of birth on our system (it was 1955) she confessed the card was her mother's.

I said to her that unfortunately I could not discuss the account with her and if there was a way to contact her mother and I could give her all the information she wanted. However, because she tried to tell me that the card belongs to the highest level of benefits, I informed her that this is not true, the account is on level 2, two levels away from the highest one.  But I could not give her any other information.

The asshole who happened to be her brother, said "And why can't you give us the information?"
I answered politely that we can only give information to the cardholder due to data protection.
He started arguing that data protection is one thing and identity fraud is another, and many other horse shit such as "If they deliver a card to my property by accident, this card belongs to me". No you bozo, this card belongs to the person whose name is on the card!
Of course I didn't call him bozo as this would be an insult to the bozos.
I said to him I don't want to argue and I would call a manager to speak to him, but, as  sodding Murphy's law had it, the managers were all serving other customers.

I politely explained that it is a business policy not to discuss details of the account, to anyone else but the customer and asked him "how would you like if someone was asking details about your account?" As a major ass hole that he was he replied that this card is not someone stranger's but his mother's. Yes, Sir Fuckface, but what if your mother doesn't want you to know how many points are on her card and comes back to me tomorrow and reports me?


The girl was also quite bitchy and was insisting that the card was on the highest level and was asking which transactions were added to the card in January. It was like I was speaking to deaf, dumb and dumber. I repeated I can't give this information.


The bloody managers were unreachable and now it was way past the end of my shift. This conversation was going nowhere. They were stubborn assholes and thank god I had witnesses, a queue of customers and my two colleagues, who saw that the fuckers were actually abusing me. 


At the end the dumb bitch murmured something like "we will take this matter to the Head Office "  (yes please see what the hell info you're going to get out of them) and they eventually got the fuck out of my face and I could finally go home.  By that time, I had become a nervous wreck.


When I went to the back office to pick up my coat and bag, the only manager I could tell my little story of pain was LB, the little bitch manager from my first blog post (go read it :D) who now I know for sure she despises me as much as I despise her.


Because not only didn't she sympathise with me, she told me off as well!
She told me off because I informed the dumb bitch of a customer that the card was not on the highest tier.  I explained to her that that was the only info I gave, and she told me off again! I shouldn't have said even that. At the same time her face was morphed into that of a hyena's, she usually has this expression when she is talking to me.
She didn't even have the decency to look at her clock and see that these wankers had kept me half an hour after my shift ended!

I was saved by the bell as her phone rang and when I got my stuff and I was passing next to her I said to her "Thanks for the support!"
I really did!!!! I hope the little bitch doesn't sack me.

What a bitch of a day. It's good to know I can come in here and rant, swear and write my guts out, otherwise if I expect to find any compassion at work I would go mental!

Coolness cont. and Docklands walk

Happy Woman's Day!

After many days of blogging hiatus (due to overtime and me being ill and grumpy) I am back!

The results for the Cool post (see below it's not late to add your comment!) are in.
I asked many people at work, family, friends, people on the streets, at the pubs, in the public toilets (ok, not really at the last three places...)
Anyway, the results I got varied. First of all, my lovely follower France from FranceRants wrote a comment that Eminem is cool. Well, indeed he is! I'm not crazy about his songs, but I love Stan and I think he's pretty cool too.
A few colleagues told me being able to succeed is cool. I agreed. And I added
"painlessly"!
My sister told me that Clive Owen is cool. My nephew thinks Jason Statham is cool.
My best friend thinks her husband is cool. And my goddaughter thinks Madonna is cool.
I agreed to all of the above!

The conclusion is that everyone has their own definition and perspective of coolness.
I noticed that not a lot of people have mentioned women, except Madge.
Quite disappointing. Aren't women cool?  Keira Knightley seems quite cool to me.

So be cool and enjoy your coolness, no matter how you define it, that's what I say!
____________________________
Today was a glorious sunny, warm day in London.  I was lucky to have a day off, so I decided to grab my iPod and go for a walk.
I have downloaded a podcast called "London Walks", which every time takes me to places in London I didn't know they existed. Today I decided to follow him down the Docklands, a once ill-reputed area full of druggies and prostitutes. Now it's considered hip, trendy and cool (there we go) as it is by the river, with gorgeous converted wharfs and houses.

It is quite easy from where I live to get to the Docklands and extremely pleasant too.
I take a bus (from the same bus stop where Samuel Guidera was stabbed, where people have laid dozens of flowers - it is quite moving) and go to Lewisham to take the Docklands Light Railway (DLR). I adore riding on the DLR it is like a mild roller coaster ride and the views are spectacular, especially as we approach Canary Wharf.

So I managed to get a front seat (the DLR trains have no driver!) and take pictures along the way.

I arrived at Shadwell station and put the podcast on.  For the first time after a very long time I had such fun!  I got lost a few times, because Richard Wright (who is a priest by the way) who does these podcast walks really fast and he goes to one place while I'm still at another.
So a couple of times I missed a turn and I had to go back, pause, rewind, replay the podcast until I got synchronised with him again.

I didn't mind while it was daylight, but after some time I was looking for a street called Rainer street and could not find it! Well, that got me annoyed! I walked up and down the same road twice, I went into streets and there was no sign, there was no one around and it was getting dark.  After I came out of a small street to the same street I was before for the second time (I was going around in circles with no results) I decided to try my Blackberry GPS. I input "Rainer Street, Docklands, London, UK" and the reply was "No Result"!
I started to get a bit desperate.  I tried again with "Rainer Street, London, UK" and boom! It gave me the directions. I finally found it, I went in put the podcast on again, only to find out that Mr Wright just wanted to show us a building in the street and then he walked back to the main street I was before! Thanks a bunch, I've just lost 45 minutes and now it's dark.

All this time he was saying that we are going to walk along the river.  I had not seen the river as yet.  I came to a gate that was leading to Thames Path, but because it was after sunset they had closed the gate and I couldn't go to see the river view, which he described as amazing. Boohoo!
I decided there and then to call it a day. I will do part II another sunny day, and maybe when my mom comes.
I took a bus to the nearest DLR station and started my way home. I had taken plenty of photos and I really had a great time, but maybe I should have started earlier (lesson learned) so that I could enjoy the whole walk. And next time, I'll carry a map as well!

Here is the slideshow from the pictures I've taken. If you'd like to read the comments I wrote about each picture you can go to the photostream on Flickr.

The Definition of Cool

It's been in my mind for days now.
What is the definition of cool?
What are the properties of being cool, the properties of coolness?
For me it's something that exhumes in your posture, your body language and the way you behave. Something mellow, mature, easy-going, calm, sophisticated, attractive all put together.  Something that shows you are successful but you are o.k. with it.  Something that other people see and want to be, to follow, to become associated with.
Something quite difficult to describe. You know something or someone is cool the minute you see them.
Being cool and trying to be cool are two completely different things...

Who is cool? Quentin Tarantino is cool. Morgan Freeman and Samuel L. Jackson. James Franco has become trendy and cool. Noel Gallagher (not Liam) from Oasis is Brit cool...

Can a woman be cool without being described as cold?
Uma Thurman is quite cool.

Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany's was the epitome of coolness...

Here's some other persons and things I think they are cool:

• Robert De Niro
• Al Pacino
• Grace Kelly 
• The way some men light their cigarettes is cool (and sexy!)
• Soho in London is very cool
• Mods were and always are cool
• Some tattoos are cool
• Calling instead of texting is cool
• Modesty is cool
• A good sense of humour is very cool
• A Mini is cool
• Nerds and geeks are the new cool thanks to shows like Chuck
• The utter coolness for me: Johnny Depp!

I am very curious to find out what and who do you think is cool.
I will post and discuss your views in my next post.

Murder most horrid

Life is not all about ha ha hee hee, let's rant about music and the tortures at work.  When something really horrible happens it brings a shock to the system and you stop and think.  Then you realise you're nothing but a grain of sand that at any moment you'll be swept away by the wind and nothing else matters any more...

Last Saturday night my nephew was at the centre of London and he was going to take the last train and come at my house to stay for the weekend.  He called me at around 11 pm and told me that he was going to a party instead and he would stay at a friend's house in Waterloo.  He was going to come to my house on Sunday.  On Sunday morning, he called me and told me that there were no trains coming to my station, because on Saturday night there was a murder near my station.


I was horrified.  My first thought was that it's not safe anywhere anymore and my second thought was how lucky that my nephew didn't come last night or, and I cringe to the thought, it might have been him...
While I explained an alternative route to my nephew, I went closer to the station to see what's going on.
There were at least two police cars blocking the road, the bus stop was not working and the whole block with the little shops was surrounded by police ribbons.  The feeling seeing this can only be described as chilling.

This is a photo I picked on the web
showing the cars on the crime scene

I went back home waiting for my nephew and googled the event. Here's what I learned:

Samuel Guidera

Samuel Guidera was a young teacher living just few blocks down from where I live and studying History and Politics at the University of Greenwich.  Last Saturday night he was watching football with friends and when he took the train back to our area, went to our local "corner" shop, bought maybe a couple of beers and was going to visit a friend who lived in a small road 200 metres away from the station.  On the way to his friend's house he was stabbed.  The police attribute the murder to a robbery.  


The whole thing freaked me out.
This didn't happen somewhere far away from where I live.  This happened exactly where I live. I go to that corner shop almost every day.  The murder spot is only a few metres from my station and from my house.  Most terribly, last night I finished work late and took the train at 21:25 and I was at my station at around 21:45.  If that had happened a week from yesterday I may have been a witness to the crime, or if I was the unlucky one, it could have been me.

Our local corner shop where I go almost every day.
Samuel can be seen shopping from the CCTV cameras.

Last night when I came out of the train there were many police officers handing out flyers about the murder and asking each and every one of us if we were on the same train last Saturday.  It was then I realised how early this murder happened, it wasn't at midnight or at 2 o'clock in the morning, it was at a time where a lot of people are coming back from work, or the pub and walk around the area.  I spoke to a policeman and said that I heard about the case but unfortunately I didn't see anything as I was at home.

My area in general is not considered one of the best in London.  I bought my flat here because the street I live in is full of beautiful houses, with middle class families as residents, and a church opposite my block of flats.  The station is five minutes walk and it has great connection with London.  Most importantly, my best friend lives a ten minute drive away. I knew it was kind of a dodgy area, but I've been living here for ten years and I was never disturbed except the usual teenagers hanging about the station and asking for a cigarette.  I was once slapped on the head in succession by four children on bikes, but I was never scared or worried. 

After last week I am quite scared and horrified.

I am also thinking Samuel's family and the poor lad himself, a young man who just started to have a good job and was probably full of ambitions, wanting to finish his studies and succeed in London, the city in so many people's dreams for a good life.  He was going to a friend's house to spend a few pleasant hours, unaware that his life would be cut short.

Flowers at the crime scene
where the young teacher lost his life.
R.I.P. Samuel

You can read the whole story in this article from BBC News and in a more recent article from a Local News website.

Please, if you know something help the police investigations by calling 
020 8345 3734 or Crimestoppers anonymously on 0800 555 111

Pet (Sound) Hates pt. II

Here is part II of my Pet Sound Hates. Oh, so help me God!!!

5.  Continuous canned applause in game shows.

Presenter: Let's play Wheel of Torture!!

Canned Applause

Presenter: Here is your first contestant: Sally from Buckinghamshire

Canned Applause

Sally turns the Wheel

Canned Applause

Sally: I would like an S please

Canned Applause

Presenter: Yes! There is one S.

Canned Applause.

Sally turns the Wheel again

Canned Applause

Sally: I would like an R please

Canned Applause

Presenter: Yes! There are two R's

Canned Applause machine explodes from overload.

*ZAP!*

4.  Speaking loudly on mobile phones. 

This is something that I believe everybody hates.  Among the various annoying mobile users I would distinguish two categories who are mobile exhibitionists:

a.  The businessmen who make all their business plans in the morning rush hour so everybody knows they are important with phrases such as "Send me an email with the spreadsheet", "Sell, sell, SELL", "Could we move the meeting at 11:00?" and other crap like that.

b. The girl who describes her shenanigans of the drunken night to her friend with phrases such as "So I was completely hammered and then we went to this other club and HE was there and he bought me another drink and we went to his place and I was wearing my strappy sandals so I said 'In yer dreams mate' and he rang me today and wants to meet again and I'm like 'duh' and he said ...." and on and on and on and in the speed of a machine gun, laughing out loud and speaking so loudly that the whole train/bus has turned around and is looking at them.  And for some reason they get angry if people listen to their stupid conversation.

I get such an immense pleasure when just one stop before my station we go into a huge tunnel for a minute and a half and these bozos start saying "Hello, hello?" and  stare at their phones, because the reception disappears just before we reach the previous station. He he he he!!!

3. My noisy neighbours

After a tiring day at work and travel full of unbearable noises I come home to relax.  Yeah, right.

I live in a block of flats and although most of the times it is very quiet, there is a devilish possibility that the noises may continue due to my noisy neighbours.

These consist of:

The 14-year-old girl right above me who just before midnight decides to crank up the karaoke machine and sing with her tone-deaf voice songs like "Bad Romance", "Papa Don't Preach", "Love Is All Around" and lo and behold "My Heart Will Go On".

Her parents have a fight almost every night while the daughter sings on Karaoke and sometimes the mother joins in after the fight to sing "I Will Survive"

On the flat next to the Karaoke Killers there is the crazy aerobics lady, who stomps on the floor while she thrusts her bum. I want to slip a note under her door and let her now that the 80's ended 20 years ago, do some Pilates, it's quieter.

There are occasional builders who will definitely ruin my days off at home.

There is a sculptor next door who bangs the chisel and the hammer, again during my days off when I try to relax.

I once started banging on the wall and shouted outside the window "STOP THE NOISE!"  It stopped for about five minutes and then started again.

Oh, will I ever find peace and quiet?

2. Rap Crap and Hip-Hop Flop

Don't get me started....The charts are full of them, the bars play them, cars pass by with their speakers in full blast and the bass making the houses tremble and my nephew listens to them religiously and tells me off for not liking them.  I think this music is full of stupid, horribly unmelodious, sample-filled, with lyrics full of swear words or words the artists invented to kill the English language, emetic videos, insulting titles (such as "F@#k the Police" by N.W.A.) and disgusting way to 'sing' erm... 'songs'.

And what's with the silly names of the artists? 2 Pac, Snoop Doggy Dog, Dizzee Rascal, Tinie Tempah, Mos Def, Dr. Dre, Ice-T, Jay-Z, T.I.... I, I, I!!! 

And by the way, how dare they call this shit R'n'B? Rhythm and Blues is the purest kind of music, deriving from the late 40's with shinning stars such as Otis Redding, Chuck Berry, James Brown, Sam Cooke and Percy Sledge and also developed to be the best kind of music this earth has ever heard, the Motown music.

The crap that today's artists compose, or shall I say just "produce" and play should be called S'n'R (Shit and Rubbish).

I could go on and on about them but I will finish by saying that when back in 1979 Sugarhill Gang released Rappers Delight it was a novelty and the song had melody, great lyrics and it rocked!!! After the end of the 80's most of the stuff that rappers released have been and continue to be pure trash.  This kind of insulting-our-ears music has made millionaires of the artist, producers (and their hos) and has created the gangsta culture which I also hate (although I have to admit that Gangsta's Paradise is a great song but I think that this may be attributed to the Stevie Wonder melody).

Honestly, if you want to see me become a nervous wreck play me any song of this genre.  I have left parties of good friends because the dj started playing crap music. 

1. Screaming children

And here we are at my number 1 pet sound hate.  The otherwise adorable children who will scream from the moment they wake up until they go to bed.

You know the ones, you've all seen them and heard them.  You are in a restaurant, on the train in the bus and there will be at least one screaming kid to ruin your day out. I'm not talking about a child talking, laughing, playing. These are sounds that are somewhat pleasurable to the ear if kept in a reasonable volume.  I am talking about the moan, the scream, the cry, the I-will-make-you-regret-you-took-me-out-of-the-house shriek, which would make Mother Theresa become like King Herod.

Sometimes the child is the devil's spawn, and the poor parents can't do anything about it, but sometimes it's also the parents' fault, because they don't give a damn if their child is uncomfortable about something and cry.

I have numerous examples, because as it is I am so lucky that I will meet one or two lovely cherubs every day on my way to work and back, but I will give you the one I remember most vividly.

I was at work on my desk and there was a queue of customers.  Second one was a mother with a girl of about 3 or 4 years old who was SCREAMING her lungs out as the mother had her standing and waiting in the line.  I remember myself as a child, I hated standing up and walking long distances I was getting very tired (by the way I never screamed, I was an angel!) so I sort of sympathised with the little girl, but I couldn't stand her shrieks.  The whole floor could hear her screaming and I thought the mother was being selfish and rude for allowing her daughter to be such a nuisance to everybody.

After I finished with my customer, who was tutting and sighing due to the fact that she couldn't hear herself think (none of us could), I immediately stood up from my desk and invited the woman with the daughter to come and sit in one of the other desks. Forgot to tell you, the friggin' woman was on the phone!!! (how could she hear?) So they sat down at the desk behind me and I gave the girl a paper and a pen to draw something and I also gave her one of our loyalty cards telling her that she could keep it and play with it.  I think the girl just fell in love with me because she shut up immediately, she started to draw and play with the card and we never heard her little voice again until they left.  So I believe the children need a bit of attention, a bit of manipulating in the good sense and a bit of love and understanding and they will be ok. It's not difficult and the parents will be making a huge favour to the rest of us who suffer by their angels' squeals.

My absolute nightmare is on the plane, it is by a rule that there would be at least one screaming child for the whole three and a half hours of my trip to Athens and back to London every summer. Rule!

Thank you Steve Jobs for the ipod! 

Concluding, I have a double message: the top part I have to repeat to myself and the bottom part is for all the noisy, annoying people with their rap 'music', screaming children, mobile phones, chisels, clicks and bleeps, karaoke machines and extra crunchy crisps:

WHAT IS YOUR PET (SOUND) HATE?

Pet (Sound) Hates pt. I

I always wanted to write rant about the noises that annoy me and now that I have a couple of minutes to spare, I thought it would be the perfect subject.

Because it's going to be quite a long post, here is the first top five from 10 to 6.
I am waiting for your own Pet Sound Hates too!

10. Snoring 

You are tired, you hit the pillow and two seconds after you are in the loving arms of Morpheus, the person next to you starts snoring.  Honestly, who thought snoring is a good thing?  It is irritating for those who try to sleep and embarrassing for those who have it.  Cure it, already!

9. People eating crisps at the Cinema

The bag makes noise, the picking up the crisps makes noise and eating the crisps makes noise.  Need I say more?  Buy pop corn, it is quieter!

8.  The gzgzgz coming from other people's headphones.

Yes, I believe the devil has invented headphones with no noise reduction to destroy me!  I'm sitting on my train, reading my book and suddenly, it comes...from two seats away: Gzzgzzgzz-gzzgzzgzz.  It can drive me mad, especially when I have no battery left on my ipod so I can listen to my own music - which I keep in moderate volume so I don't get hateful stares from my fellow travelers.  

I know what I'm talking about.  I grew up in the 80's and the Walkman was the craze of that decade... I was a wild teenager, listening to my Madonna and Depeche Mode in full blast on those old headphones that barely touched my ears and all I can remember is my mom looking at me with wide eyes full of disapprovement.

I'm all grown up now and I can totally feel her.  I hate listening to other people's gzgzgzgz through their headphones.

7.  Mobile phone key clicks and beeps.

There was a girl sitting next to me at our staff area where we go to relax and all she did for the whole damn break was to text like a maniac and she had the key sound ON!!! Honestly, I wanted to take her mobile off her hand and shove it in her mouth.

It's very simple: you go to Settings-->Sounds-->Key Sounds--> and you select NONE! Otherwise everybody is going to hate you.

6.  Mobile phone music players

What is worse than the music coming from headphones and mobile phone clicks?  The devilish combination of both: the mobile phone music players.

A very frequent phenomenon in London buses - especially where I live in South East London. The "youffs" who usually put their music through their phones should all be banned from public transport.  They put on some awful hip-hop, dubstep, shitty kind of "music" (using the term extremely loosely) in full volume, which sounds even more terrible through the little speaker of their mobiles.  I got in a fight with one of them once but I reluctantly backed off as I was scared that he would pull out a knife and stab me or something similar.

Part II coming soon...

An update for this blog.

Hello World!

Sorry I haven't been around for such a long time. I've been really busy and I had very little time to blog, to my dismay. I have to find the time, even to write a small paragraph and rant about something, LOL.

Weeell, have a look at the page.  I've added a Facebook page so you can ''all'' (!!!) go and like this blog, a Networked Blogs link to follow on Facebook and a nifty little gadget that shows my visitors from around the world.  Take it easy guys, one by one, you'll all get a piece.
You can also add me as a friend on Facebook, if you dig to read my outbursts during my crazy days.

Just to make things clear: I am not an unsociable saddo that has no friends. This is a brand new FB profile and page, hopefully it will accrue more followers and friends soon.

I love the whole social networking thing, all I wish is that I had more time to dedicate to it, as I am in awe of what some fellow bloggers have accomplished.

So here we go, I will be more consistent with my posts and hopefully it will escalate into something beautiful and I will meet lots of interesting people to share my ideas and rants with.

For the moment, I bid you goodnight and have a great rest of the week until we meet again.

Oh! The Humanity...

Time for a rant.
Rant for people who are so detached from real life that they don't know their own address.
Rant for people who are so filthy rich that they can't see beyond their perfect world.
Rant for people who think that us, honest workers who serve them, are their slaves and not real human beings.

I am talking of course about a category of customers who come, ruin my day and go back to their meaningless lives.

Case Study No 1: The Ignorant Billionaire.
Me: Hello, how can I help you today?
TIB: I would like to know how much I've got on my card
Me: Of course.  Could you please confirm your name and current address?
TIB: My name is XXXX.
Me: And your address?
TIB: Erm... which one? I have many...
Me: The one you submitted when you registered.
TIB: Switzerland?
Me: No
TIB: Monaco?
Me: No
TIB: Saudi Arabia?
Me: No. To help you, in the UK.
TIB: In Belgravia?
Me: Could you confirm your full address please?
TIB: .......................SW1
Me: Sorry madam, I need the full address
TIB: I don't remember! (irritated) I've got so many....!
Me: Could you please confirm your date of birth then?
TIB: I'm not going to tell you my date of birth!
Me: It's right there in front of me. For security reasons you need to confirm it.
TIB: (confirms D.O.B. behind gritted teeth) You shouldn't ask these questions.  they're private.
Me: Here is your balance madam. Anything else I can do for you today?
TIB: There, was that so difficult? Why do you ask all these questions?
Me: Because, how would you like if I would divulge this information to someone else? We have to make sure it is you that asks questions about this account.
TIB: Of course it's me? Who else would it be?
Me: :O :S :X  :) (jaw drops, frowns, says nothing, smiles...) Thank you! Have a lovely day!

Case Study 2: The Filthy Rich Complainer
Yesterday I was in charge of emails. We received an email from a customer, who in a nutshell (her email was five paragraphs!) said the following:
Dear Sir or Madam
I am writing to complain that you sent me a statement on the 31/12/10 showing that I had 50000 points, giving me £500.  When I came to spend them last week, they were not there. If you don't rectify this mistake, I will never shop in your store again.


In which I replied:
Dear Madam
According to our records, you spent your points on the 1/1/11, one day after this statement was issued. You used them in the Ladieswear department for a transaction of £4,800. Sincerely....etc.


I mean, come on! If I had bought something for £4,800 in one transaction and used £500 off my loyalty points, I would remember it, right?  But some people are so filthy rich they don't care how much they spend and they don't even remember.

Case Study 3: The Ironic One
Some people don't realise that business have their own rules.  Our loyalty program is a little bit complicated and we remind our customers of the rules in every communication.  One of the rules is to bring in their receipts on the same day of purchase if they want their points added.  That's the rule, a bit harsh I know, but there are reasons behind it, but we are quite flexible and add receipts from all times, as long as they are from the same year.

A lady came to me today with receipts from 27th of December 2010.  That's not only a month ago, but from the previous year.  I mention it to the customer, I inform her that she now will be able to use the points the following year because she missed out on the automatic conversion of the points which happens at the end of the year and she gets all grumpy!
TIO: What? Next year? What sort of stupid program is that?
Me: thinking (It's the same one you signed for when you registered for our card. But do you ever read our communication? Do ya? No, of course you don't)
Don't worry, madam.  I will add them for you so you get your points. They will be added on to this year's points.

I complete the transaction, asking her how she's been, being polite, calm, smiley, professional.
At the end I thank her and she sort of thanks me with a grunt, and you know what she said?
"Thanks! You'll see me again next year!!!"

Meaning, "I'll do what I want, I will not follow your stupid rules and I will bust your balls for eternity".
Suits you, then. You're the one who would have to wait for a whole year to use her points.

And these are only 3 of the thousands of lovely custys we have every day. I have told my teammates that we should all gather our stories and write a book!

More to come, stay tuned.

Turbulent Week

It has been a turbulent week and I wanted to blog about it but I couldn't, what with the family around and their noses poking everywhere...

Where should I begin? Ah...yes!
The laptop incident.

Before the family arrived I put a password on my laptop so they wouldn't be able to go in to it and read this stuff and what I've written about them etc. while I was at work.
The first day my nephew was at home on his own (he brings his own Macbook, I've got a Dell laptop) I receive a text message from him ''what is your laptop password because my charger doesn't work and my laptop's battery died''.

Fat chance. I had to protect myself and prevent family and colleagues and anyone else I write about, from reading this blog!  This is why I come here to rant, because I can't say it to their faces, so they should never read this.
So I called him....and I lied! I pretended that I didn't know how the hell my laptop all of a sudden had a password, as I never set one up myself.  Thankfully, my nephew, as progressive, smart and modernised he is, he is not as computer literate as his evil auntie!
Therefore, he bought the lie!  I told him I will look into it when I get home, which I did and continued the big lie by telling him an obscure story that I did a system restore and my laptop went back to its original settings with an old passport which I found written in some old notebook.  The sweetie nephew believed it and I felt horribly for lying to him, but I also felt relieved.  So while him and my sister were here I cleared my bookmarks and my history and didn't come near this place at all. Oh, how I missed it! I only tweeted from my Blackberry and that was it.

So the sister arrived Sunday afternoon after I spent the whole day licking the house literally, I waited for her at the station for an hour. I was glad to see her but I knew what was coming.  Don't get me wrong, I adore my sister, we get along very very well, she's always been there for me, we laugh a lot, we have the same sense of humour, but she is very demanding and completely opposite of what I am and stand for.  I am more relaxed, artistic, literary, a bit aloof sometimes, approachable and flexible.  She has a closed personality, she always had very wealthy friends, which made her live or want to live the high life with less than half the money her friends have.  She has a in-house maid which means that she expects to find the same standards when she comes to my house, but she doesn't realise that I work all day and have limited hours to clean, go to the supermarket and do my chores on my day off.  Which concludes on her being a pain when she is here... 'you have to do this', 'you have to do that', 'this needs changing', 'your walls need painting over' etc.

When she came in she turned on ALL the lights, because she can't look at dark places, she wanted to watch the Golden Globes and, I'm sorry but my block of flats doesn't allow satellite dishes so I don't have Sky, so she sort of told me off for living here (!!!), she asked me to remove half of my clothes from my closet so she could fit hers (she brought two suitcases for a week!!!) and found the house impressionably clean but she said it still needed a lot of work (????!!!). This makes me sound like I am a dirty sloth, but honestly, the house was very clean, C-L-E-A-N!!!  How much cleaner can I house be? I'm telling you she's obsessed.

Next, she would go on about my personal appearance: my clothes, my hair, my teeth (while she had braces put on when she was younger I hadn't because of course we could only afford for one back then and of course her teeth were more important than mine, so mine are a bit crooked), now she says 'I have to save money to put braces on'!!!!

I can't complaint though, she paid for my haircut and it looks good, but the scrutiny and the constant criticising never stopped!

But all of the above are nothing in comparison to her spending money. She spends uncontrollably, with no second thought and with no realisation that this is not extra money, but the little money her small business makes just to make ends meet.  Two years ago she nearly went bankrupt and it was very difficult to stand on her feet again with the economic crisis, and that even didn't teach her a lesson.  Ever since her son came to the UK to study she's been in London THREE times! That's three times in four months!!!
And there's always an excuse. First time it was to help my nephew settling in in the University.  Fair enough. The second time it was with no reason, just hopped on a plane on a Friday afternoon and nearly gave me a heart attack because of course I had only two hours to air and clean the house before she would come.  This time it was an exhibition to buy things for her store.  She only went to this exhibition for one afternoon and for the rest of the week it was just spend, spend, spend and MORE spend!!!!

She would take a black cab most of the times, while most of us, normal people, would go on the bus or underground.  But she was always 'feeling sick', 'too tired', 'too cold' and I live 'too far away' from the centre so we must hurry to catch the last train. We are talking about £15-20 cab rides each time.
And then there's the water.  She would buy mineral water to drink, while the water from the tap is perfectly pure and safe.  I told her this and she agreed, but still, I caught her buying water again... Pound coins scattered here and there...It broke my heart.
She was ready to buy a new charger for her son's laptop (that's about £60), when I reminded them that the Macbook was still under warrantee but the silly boy hadn't brought it with him, so someone has to email it to them. They still haven't done it...

As she would criticise me about everything, I tried to put a bit of sense into her mind about the spending, but she would stop me.  So it was ok for her to scrutinise me about all the details in my life but if I wanted to give her my two cents about her relentless spending I had to shut up. Well, as I am a person who knows how to shut up and not create a scene, that's what I did but I am worried and unless we win the lottery I won't stop worrying.

Now for the good things:

• We had a fabulous day together on my day off, we went to the hair salon and had our hair and nails done.
• We went to Somerset House and looked at some amazing paintings and we cultured ourselves!
• It was nice having company at home at night, we would sit and watch DVD's and talk and laugh, I really liked that.

Now that I'm back I will write more often, as I will certainly remember more details to write about my turbulent week.

For now it's goodnight and a very warm WELCOME to my first follower, FranceRants!

The Weak End Is Here!

Hello World!!!

It's Saturday night, and while London is swinging and buzzing, I am home alone with my laptop, in my very clean house ready to rant.

The story of the laundry continued yesterday morning, when it was around 7:55 and my laundry hadn't arrived yet.  On the laundry's card there were 3 mobile phone numbers so I decided to dial the first one.  Immediately I was greeted by Ray. I wanted to ask him if he found out whether the other lady had confessed that she had indeed company on Wednesday night, but I opted-in to just give him my name and explain the situation.
He recognised me and informed me that the delivery guy has been waiting outside the block of flats, not knowing which door to ring for half an hour, as the Laundry Idiot hadn't written down my flat number.
Why was I not surprised? I ran to the window and saw him waiting outside, so I buzzed him in. I finally got my laundry back and I gave him the money which was £25, but I had only £30 on me.
- Can I bring you a fiver another time, I got no change on me (brilliant!)
- Forget it, keep the change, we've been through a lot you and I because of the Laundry Idiot.

So £5 poorer, I ran and caught the 8:14 train and thankfully I was at work on time.

Around 4 pm I started praying ''please God, let there be no guests tonight, I can't take it''.
I couldn't take it.  I felt so exhausted that I couldn't even bear the thought of entertaining three guests.  And just when I finished praying, a message dinged on my mobile.
It was my nephew.
Letting me know that the girls could not make it!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I wanted to scream from joy!!!  God showed pity on me and fulfilled my wish.
Apparently one of the girls couldn't afford the trip to London because she had to pay £1,500 on mobile charges! WTF? And LOOOOOL!
How can you get £1,500 mobile bill? Was she calling China and talking for hours? She's only been in the UK for four months. I really pity her parents.
Anywho, yesterday nephew and I went to Chinatown for a nice chinese dinner and we came home to watch a DVD.  Halfway through the movie, I fell asleep... Total bliss...

So not much to rant....yet. We'll see how the next days will go, as my beloved sibling arrives with lots planned, to drive me crazy!
Tomorrow morning is early wake up (on my precious Sunday) and a bit more cleaning, refreshing and de-smelling before HRH comes.

Get ready for some real rants!!!!

They are all doing it on purpose!

Today was a normal day at work and everything was quiet.
(Very rare phenomenon!). I was mainly in the office dealing with emails (deja-voodoo!) and yes, if you're asking I replied to more than 30 emails today!!!

So, as work was ok, I will take this luxurious opportunity to rant about...

EVERYTHING ELSE

Story No: 1 - The Laundry Idiot.

Quite like the village idiot, but with the purpose of making me a nervous wreck.

My sister is coming next Sunday and for a whole week, (I adore my sister, but I could write a whole blog just for her) and this means spring-cleaning, redecorating, re-upholstering, renovating and if possible removing my whole flat.

She is (or thinks she is) like Madame Pompadour. She hates my area (it is to be truthful a bit dodgy) and she is very judgmental of the way I live, act etc. and most of all how clean is my house (it's fecking spotless!), why I don't have enough heat, why the curtains are hung like this and so many more.

So for at least one month I am cleaning, refreshing, spraying, fixing every nook and cranny in the house.  I bought two new heaters so she won't be cold and she won't make my life difficult with her insulting comments.  I washed all the bedlinen and because I have no time to iron (also I hate it) on Monday I took them round the corner to be ironed, they really do a splendid job.

Here is the scenery:

- Hello I have these bedlinen which need ironing. Could you please deliver them on Wednesday or Thursday when I start work late?  I took out my schedule and showed it to him, so we decided which day was the best to deliver them. We discussed it for about 10 minutes, honestly!

- No problem, please give me your details.

- These are my details... 

I watched the guy writing down my details and I nearly choked when I saw the way he wrote my number. He was putting a hyphen - every three numbers and the whole number didn't fit the line and he had to go underneath. I started worrying a bit so I repeated:

- Please make sure they are delivered Wednesday or Thursday. Give me a call first so I know.

- No problem.

I sure hoped there wouldn't be one and I left.

Yesterday passed...nothing.  I couldn't stop by because I would miss my train.

Today I was waiting for them for the whole morning.  Idiot as I am myself, I didn't have their phone number (big mistake,never again)

So I went to see them on my way to the train. I left plenty of time so that I could catch my train, it was 10:10 and my train was leaving at 10:30.  And lo and behold, what was sitting next to the door, neatly ironed and packed? Yes, you guessed it, my laundry!!!

I said to myself to be calm and not punch the guy who was ready to go out and have a fag, and I asked why my laundry hadn't been delivered as promised.

He started rummaging through his papers and at the end he had the nerve to tell me: 

- Did we arrange delivery?

- No, I just wanted to show you my busy schedule, just for kicks.

Story 2: The Laundry Gossiper

At that precious moment, a lady comes out and understands what has happened and she was very embarrassed, I thought that she would smack the guy on the head.

The problem was that tomorrow I have to leave the house at 7:45 to get to work at 9 am.

So the only time the laundry can be delivered is before 7:45, which looked like a problem to her as the store opens at 8 am. I literally live around the corner from their store, they can come, drop the things off and go to open the store (and if I'm cheeky maybe also give me a lift?)

However, this looked like a mission impossible to her.  She picks up her phone and calls a man called Ray and while she was talking to him about me, she started arguing with him about someone coming to her place the previous night, and 'no, I was alone, no-one came' and this went on for about 5 minutes.  The time was now 10:25 and I was ready to explode!  I was pretty sure that I was going to miss my train.  Talk about customer service!  

In the meantime, the Laundry Idiot had gone out for a fag!  He had done the dirty deed and he didn't give a fuck about me, the store, the whole damn world!!!

Finally, it was arranged for tomorrow morning. By the time she hung up and took my details again (she had a look at the Idiot's scribbling and her eyes popped out of their sockets) it was 10:32 and I had missed my train. Which concluded in me getting a taxi from the station to go to work. Which concluded in me paying through the nose for travel I get for free with my weekly travelcard, because of the incompetency of the Laundry Arseholes.

Will tweet if my laundry comes or not tomorrow....

Story 3: The Three Guests.

I am having guests tomorrow. OH,YES I AM!

I knew that my nephew, who studies here was coming from Friday.  I like him a lot and we have lots of fun when we are together but today he had a nasty surprise for me.

He sent me a message to call him about a request for the weekend. 

O-oh, I thought, this can never be good.

So I dialed his number with shaky hands and the request was that he wants to bring along two friends (girls) whom I've never met, seen before in my life, and apparently for one of them neither has he.

Now, I am a softy and cannot say no, but that meant:

• Prepare two bedrooms  and three beds with my (yet to be delivered) clean and fresh-smelling laundry
• Sleep on the sofa, as the two girls will be sleeping in my double bed and I had not to disturb them when I leave the house for work the next morning.
• Buy snacks and drinks, as I want to be the hostess with the mostest and be nice to the girls.
• Sleep late tomorrow as they would probably want to watch DVD's until dawn and the player is in the living room.
• My nephew sort-of dictated to me that I should have my clothes for the next day ready, as I shouldn't go in MY room, where they will be sleeping, to get ready for work
• Most importantly, would have to clean and air the house once more before my sister comes on Sunday, as the girls, the nephew (and probably myself) are all smokers and my sister isn't and she complains constantly about the smell....

So tomorrow I will wake up at 6:30 and prepare the two bedrooms, wait for the blasted laundry, go to work, deal with the issues there, meet the little fockers, probably cook something for them, or order and pay for pizzas or chinese (nephew told me they can't afford anything - and I can?) and entertain until the wee hours of the morning.

Saturday wake up, put the house and myself on mute (toilet flush seems a bit of a problem because when it flushes the whole neighbourhood can hear it), get ready, go to work, deal with more issues, come back, clean, cook, clean more, air the house, spray house deodorant and probably empty a whole bottle of my precious diptyque house fragrance, and after all that, collapse!!!

My relatives, co-workers and the whole damn Universe don't want me to relax. For some reason they are doing it on purpose!

I apologise for the very long post, but it feels so incredible just to write all this down and get it off my chest and to my blog.

Rest assured, with such an adventurous forth-night, there will be plenty to RANT about!

15 is not a magic number

The story from yesterday continues...
It was a bad day, but today was even worse.

Yesterday I was on the shop floor and because I went through a cold/sore throat/misery last week, I was coughing. Sometimes in a usual "cough-cough" way and sometimes with loud coughy sounds.  About an hour later I receive an email from one of the managers that I need to go and see her (all my managers are female and by the way, much younger than me).
So I go to see her and she tells me that she had two complaints that my cough was very loud and disturbing other people, customers, passers by, the homeless hobo outside the store etc.
WTF????? I was coughing not farting!
Therefore I was asked politely to go to one of the offices (so now they give me office time!) and deal with emails.  Fair enough, I go to the office and start dealing with the emails, total 28.  That was a fair number, I was probably going to finish all of them.
FAIL! Before lunchtime I had only dealt with three.  They were complicated, with obscure requests, with me going back and forth to the customer's accounts to see their activities, to read other colleagues notes, to liaise with managers and so on.
By 5 o'clock I had dealt with 10 and because I was finishing by 5:30 I dealt with five more easier ones and I left. (The good thing with my job is that when it's time to finish, you finish. Unless you are a manager, hehe).

Cue today.
Our Area Manager is usually a softy.  Very nice and understanding to all of us. I don't know what got into her today and she took me aside and started talking to me about me coughing and me smoking, and how I should quit smoking because it affects my health. (Like hell I am going to quit!  I am VERY stressed to give up on ciggies now). So far so good.  I was nodding, sometimes agreeing, sometimes debating. Nothing much.

Until she asked me the crucial question: (we'll call her Not Always Softy Area Manager)
NASAM: How many emails did you do yesterday?
ME: 15... (waiting for the worst to come of course)
NASAM: That's nothing. Why so few?
ME: Erm... They were quite complicated...

(Parenthesis: I am very good at responding to emails. My emails have won commendations, have become into templates for others to use and when everyone had to send their emails to the managers to be proof-read, I was the only one who didn't have to do this. And yesterday I was not copying and pasting from other templates, but I was writing from scratch each answer, as many requests were unique-never-seen-before requests - end of parenthesis).

So NASAM takes me inside the office (there's that fecking office again) and we go through the emails, one-by-one and she was reading each and every one of my replies.

NASAM: That doesn't look complicated - that is copy and paste (huh?) - that's the same with the other one (ok, one!) - ok that's a bit more complicated - there you wrote extra things the customer didn't ask you for (fec-xcuse me for going the extra mile for the customer) - this is easy - this is shit - this is bollocks.
One by one she found them easy and not so complicated, she only found two that in her opinion were the more complicated ones.

(Second parenthesis - each email takes at least 10-15 mins to deal with, and these are the easy ones.  The more complicated ones might take half an hour, an hour or even days to complete.  The procedure is: copy customer's info like email, phone numbers etc. on the database, format the email to standard Arial 10, delete or change all other messages if another dept. has forwarded the email, change subject title, deal with customer's request, reply to the customer, proof-read, send and leave detailed note on their account - phew! - end of second and, I promise, last parenthesis)

NASAM told me that this was a very disappointing number and I should improve my productivity. I wanted to cry.  I told her that I wasn't just sitting in that office doing nothing, honest to God these emails had a lot of work on them.  Her reply was to lower my voice so that I don't create a scene...

My biggest problem with this job is: WHAT MORE CAN I GIVE? I am doing beyond my best, beyond 100%, beyond my strengths.  I am fully dedicated, a soldier, a robot, a bleeding worker.  I am committed and responsible, I am not a silly young girl who does this job as a springboard, I love my job, but I would like a bit of understanding and recognition.

After a long, unfulfilling day - yes! in the office again because of my coughing - I was dealing with enrollments and emails today, all together - I will see the results of my performance tomorrow - all I need is to come home, light a cigarette ( :P ) and RANT!

Sucker of the month

Call me a bit vain, but today I was really pissed off for not getting Employee of the month at work.  I was ok with my colleague who got it, however, let me rant!

I have been the trainer of this department for the last four years. Every new member has been trained by me.  A few months ago and while my Area Manager was on maternity leave, they hired a Project Manager (we'll call her BB, the Big Bitch) who wanted to divide and conquer, so one of the first things she did, accompanied by one of the departments' Managers (we'll call her LB, the Little Bitch)
was to take me to the office and take away my position as trainer.  The reason? No attention to detail...
- 'The training modules are full of mistakes', said LB. - Well excuuuuse me! Gimme the friggin' time to update them and they will be as good as new!  I'm up to my arse in workload and you keep putting off the office time to update them, what the hell do you expect from me? To do them in my sleep?
-'You don't follow up your training' said BB. - pardon? I don't follow up? Erm, you just dropped in from Mars and you know what I've been doing the last four years?  Not only I follow up, but I keep on asking, sending emails, make suggestions, keep an eye on new recruits and I update the Managers with the progress.

After a loooot of debating, BB decided to stop me from being trainer for a few months and not to touch the modules until that time.  As you can imagine, the updates and the new procedures snowballed in the meantime and when it was time to update them again it took me hours.  Precious hours of my own time, at home, at breaks, in between customers... I did it anyway.  The modules have been updated.  The good news is BB is no longer responsible for our area, our Area Manager has come back and life is (kinda) back to normal.

Meanwhile, I also produced two more things - while being on the shopfloor and serving crazy custys and being extremely busy!


One thing was a PowerPoint presentation of all new promotions in our area, something that I will update every month (and believe me, we have a lot of promotions in our area), which looks and acts like a website - everybody's jaw dropped when they saw it.

And just before the rotting Sale started, LB (who now tries to be nice) asked me to do a mini manual for people in other areas of the company, in case they needed to help us. Fair enough, will you gimme some time in the office to do it?


NOOOO, of course not! You'll become an octopus, with eight hands, eight brains and eight eyes and you'll do it while serving customers, answering phones, replying to emails, registering new customers, training the new girl and by the way, we need 25 things to be explained in the manual and you have one week to finish it....


And so I did.  Exactly as described above.  The little mutant octopus in me came out and I finished the damn thing, with lots of never discussed before material, screen shots, photoshops, drawings, index tables and all that one day before the blasted deadline.
In the meantime, excellent customer service, and me always chirpy, smiling, tireless, positive, adaptable, flexible, calm, philosophical...

Jaws dropped again. 'Well done, Ranteuse, very impressive'

Bollocks.

It was forgotten the next hour. And so was my promotions presentation. I did all that for fuck all.  I had heard a slip of the tongue from one of the managers though that I had been nominated for employee of the month.

So I waited with anticipation for today.  Not that it would mean anything more, you get a ridiculous £10 voucher, but who doesn't like a bit of public recognition for their hard work?
As I said, I was happy for my colleague, who is one of my favourite people in the department, but it was quite anti-climactic, let-down and a bit of a bombshell for all this trauma and trouble I've been through.  Not even a mention (like when they give the honourary Oscars to someone who's never won a real one, you know!)

That's why this blog has been born.  As I can't say it to their faces, at least I can come here and RANT!!!! 
Because, believe me, nothing feels better than a big ol' rant after a hellish day.